There is no fool who is disowned by his family. And Ibrahim Kashim Talla is no exemption. He is the only one who can explain what he meant in Bamenda during the celebration of the 32 years of Biya, when he said “... Man of peace, Paul Biya, the tireless guarantor of national unity.”

Our people say that ‘peace does not make a good ruler’, and even go further to posit that ‘when there is peace in the country, the chief does not carry a shield.’ So, what peace is Kashim talking about? Politically, still, the only positive mark the Anglophone can be proud of is the birth place of the CPDM; Bamenda.

Biya is said to have spearheaded democracy in Cameroon. Others followed like the SDF, UNDP, UPC, UDC, MDR and today’s CRAC. The CPDM holds the record of converting university lecturers into adept praise singers, hand clappers and motion of support writers. If you doubt this, ask 61-year-old and portfolio-stricken Elvis Ngolle Ngolle. Lecturers are confused between going to amphitheatres and attending CPDM rallies and that is why Kashim is idle.

Civil servants do not know where their priorities lie; work or politics?

Robert Nkili even broke the record in 2012 by signing a service note inviting all workers of the Ministry of Transport [of both central and decentralised services] to his birthday in his Etoug-Ebe residence. Carbon copies were sent to the Director of General Affairs, which means that Regional Delegates were put on mission for a birthday. CPDM oyééé!

The CPDM has won all elections in Cameroon and putting oppositions parties far behind. Fru Ndi has, forever and ever, remained second, no matter how hard he tried. Biya is to politics in Cameroon as José Mourinho is to football.

New Deal, Communal Liberalism, Great Achievements, Major Accomplishments, Vision 2035, and so on, are part of a compendium of slogans Biya has created, but all have always been mere propaganda. He has, time without number, shuffled the political cards but West Cameroonians have always harvested unripe fruits. Key portfolios have been reserved for East Cameroonians.

Institutionally, in 2013, Biya finally set up the Senate of Cameroon which was created long ago by the 1996 constitutional amendment. But the problem with the Senate was the electoral process and the selection criteria. Old and tired, some senators cannot even read the first pages of bills tabled before them. Some even sleep and snore, with mouths so wide-open that flies play hide and seek in inside. The rate at which they are returning to dust is astounding.

Under Biya, since 1992, the post of Prime Minister has become a gift to people who hail from West of the Mungo; Achidi, Musonge, Inoni and now Yang. Who is next?

In Parliament, a 74-year-old, Mada-born, Class Seven graduate, has been plagiarising Biya by staying Speaker of the Glass House since 1992 (22 years) and MP since the beginning of time.

A grey jammed third or even fourth age fellow is at the helm of the Supreme Court since 1996. Biya has refused to set up the Constitutional Council since the 1996 constitutional amendment. If this organ was set up, it might have enforced Article 66 of the Constitution and embezzlement would have been minimised.

The Social and Economic Council, with Luc Ayang as head, is as dormant as a ‘ngong’ dog.

Cameroon is, undeniably, a free country, but how free are we: when Tchiroma will say Bibi Ngotta died of AIDS and opportunistic diseases; when the State sets up and controls organs like the National Communication Council; when DOs and SDOs can deny authorisation to a political party that wants to offer gifts to the needy? Which kind of freedom is it when journalists publish articles and the military court puts them under house arrest? Ask Rodrigue Tongue, Félix Cyriaque Ebolé Bola and Baba Wamé.

What freedom, when Kah Walla was kidnapped like a thief and pulled by her red headscarf, for thinking differently; when Mboua Massok is constantly monitored by law enforcement officials and his moves punctured, for having a different opinion; when Press Club on CRTV Buea is banned by the Almighty Gov.

Di or Be Lie; when people are arrested because they say Biya must go. If Cameroon was free, why would the people of Nso lament when their Fon decides to convert from a Christian to a Muslim? Anyway, if 2035 was dependent on religion, Cameroon would have attained emergence long ago.

Education under Biya is one of the areas where some progress was made in terms of creating nonexistent schools and universities. Azong Wara was given the GCE Board after a long struggle. ASTI was created in 1985 to solve the language problems in Cameroon before leading to the creation of UB in 1993. Kumba is blessed with an HTTTC, although Nalova and Endeley are playing with it like two women who have the same husband.

Scholarships that used to exist in the era of Kashim Talla are back; Lifaka even went building two classrooms worth FCFA 17 million as her own contribution to the educational system in GHS Bojongo in 2006. Who are we fooling?

University lecturers now go on strike more than students. SYNES now takes it as a game. If Fame Ndongo does not reply a letter from SYNES, they go on strike. If Nalova does not greet a lecturer, they go on strike.

Biya promised free education at the nursery and primary levels but it is not free. Parents pay PTA which is even more expensive than the school fee. There is a new job position called PTA President in Cameroon. Amphitheatres are not sufficient, student restaurants have low quality food, certificates and diplomas are issued post-mortem.

Low quality in the French subsystem of education: in 2011 the media published alleged remarks that to pass the BEPC, a six-average was allowed. Allowances of lecturers are paid like electricity supply to Salapoumbé. Marks are transmitted sexually or monetarily. Go to the Faculty of Arts at the University of Buea and visit the Department of History.

Marks are sold like ‘okrika’ in the market, and if you are a female student and money is a problem, the History lecturers will partition you like the British and French did to Cameroon and annex your private territory. Some History lecturers are even becoming gynaecologist with forceps under the skirts of female students.